How do you watch four hours of rich people congratulating each other on their taste in music? Even in high-def and surround sound, it's gonna be hard. Which is why I recorded it and watched it later with my finger on the fast-forward button. So yeah, I missed at least three of the four hours … sue me if I missed your favorite moment.
Jann Wenner … ff … Ahmet Ertegun, great man … ff … the Ronettes ... STOP!
Well, Ronnie talked for so long I started to ff again, so I don't know why somebody else came out to sing with the Ronettes. Anyway, Ronnie Spector is right up there with Marianne Faithfull in the Guaranteed to Get Straight Guys of a Certain Age to Get Nostalgically Hard Department. Sang kinda flat, though. Amazing how well the CBS Orchestra approximated the Wall of Sound, and Anton must have loved playing Hal Blaine's "Be My Baby" drumbeat. Then Paul had to go spoil it all by reading a letter from Phil Spector. Geez, Paul, did you read something from Charles Manson when the Beach Boys got in?
Then, Patti Smith. Always nice to see Patti. A rock critic's dream come true, Patti Smith and Lenny Kaye playing together at the Hall of Fame. On the other hand, you could sum up the entire problem with the Hall just by noting how absurd it was for Patti to scream "OUTSIDE OF SOCIETY!" to a bunch of rich fucks.
Ff ff ff ff … how was the JB tribute? … Van Halen (ff ff ff ff) … and then, finally, the most important part of the evening:
Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five. Hip hop finally makes it into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. The rich fucks were a bit puzzled … they'd better get used to it, the floodgates are open, by 2017 four out of five inductees will be hip hop artists.
Ff WHOOPS!!! Rewind rewind rewind … it's a blast from the past, "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" with Prince. I can never pass that one up. Highlight of the entire show, in fact.
R.E.M. ff ff ff ff … is it over yet? … ff ff ff … they think it's over … it IS!